Testing the Water (sticking in my big toe)

Life is not about the ease of living. I wish it was. I wish we could coast along, merrily, enjoying the things that come easily to us. Perhaps that is what I have done. Have I rarely challenged myself? Like...ever? My father once observed that I am happy to do that which comes easily for me. I certainly only ever did enough in a Physical Education Class to get the personally required "A" grade. When that requirement was met, I felt justified moving on to other pursuits that interested me more. When I was raising our children, I was all in. These were achievements that I rejoiced in. I loved being a mother. I loved caring for their individual needs and encouraging them to pursue their talents. I was their most enthusiastic cheerleader. I humbly submit that I successfully raised four of the most remarkable humans that came to the Earth. They each, in turn, showed their gratitude by supplying me with beautiful, talented, brilliant grandchildren. They have become my new "everything". Now what? I don't know. I have a future to fill with electives. And I am afraid. What am I afraid of? I am afraid of new challenges. I am afraid of not earning an "A". I am afraid to admit that my mind is not as sharp as it used to be. There. I said it. I have been diagnosed with "Mild Cognitive Impairment". It often is a pre-cursor to Alzheimers Disease. And my future is unclear.